Ruptured...again...

Just when everything seems like a brand new story for me....well....looks like it's not going to be happily ever after....anymore...

How happy I was when I thought that I would eventually find that special someone...but now....looks like that thought is still far-fetched...Heck, I was not even close to gaining a spot in her heart...

She's just in front of me....the centre of attention after her wonderful, magnificent performance...and there was I....clutching to her birthday present..Yet I didn't move a muscle when I see her...Is it because she's so dazzling that night? Or is it her aura that trapped me into her vicinity?

No...it was my fear....my fear for starting a new page for my life....

Yeah....I didn't mustered my courage to walk up to her whenever I have clear-cut chances...And now...Someone else found that opening...I guess...I'm just too late.....One year too late...Why wasn't I here earlier?

How idiotic I was, not to grasp the chance I was given....probably by the circumstances....or perhaps by God...but it's too late to cry over spilled milk...I don't deserve this luck...Others who are much better than me do...

Disappointed does not seem to be the correct word...I mean...I should be happy if she's happy...or so I thought I ought to...Ruptured should be the word to describe the wound in my heart now...that heavy.....remorseful feeling engulfing me...

I did realise one thing though....I had nothing within my grasp....No talents for people to awe about....No money to buy dinner.....No sharp looks on my face....All this point to the voidness of my life....The cause for this emptiness of my ever-lonely heart....

Sometimes, I do get disappointed easily....Maybe too easily....Perhaps I should accept this cursed fate of mine and move on...further....hopefully forward....Perhaps I would find another special someone....yet will I?

Maybe I could follow Hercules' footsteps...go the distance...and there would be a hero's welcome waiting in her arms....but....who's her??